Friends and CO.

"Associate yourself with people of good quality, for it is better to be alone than in bad company."

I can't think of a quote that rings more true than this one by Booker T. Washington. 

Look around you. Do you thoroughly enjoy the company you keep? Are you positively stimulated by them? Do you respect them? Do they lift you up, support and encourage your endeavors? And are they around to catch you when you fall? 

The nature of the business I work in involves encounters with many a negative and jaded person. I get it, life is fucking hard, there are horrible days that can sometimes overshadow good days. You wake up late, there's too much traffic, you spilled coffee on yourself, an audition went badly, you get a parking ticket, you don't want to be at work, you have cramps. All of the aforementioned are things I've thrown a fit over. 

But I'm not talking about bitching about a bad day, I'm talking about carrying negative energy around you 24-7. Everyone has at least one person they can think of that is this glass-is-always-half-empty complainer, that friend or classmate or colleague whose life is just "THAT BAD." 

Well, I don't know them personally, but I'm going to make an assumption their life probably isn't THAT bad. In fact, at the very last do they have their health? Yes? Great, they can shut the fuck up. 

When having an awful day, I force myself to list things I am happy and grateful for. It certainly doesn't make the bad stuff un-happen, but it reminds me that there is always good in my life.

Negative people, jealous people, cynics, mean and disrespectful people -- they all feed off others. Others who listen to them, who give their complaints the time of day. People who tolerate them and deal with them because, "that's just how they are."

When I'm around someone who only has bad things to talk about, I wonder, aren't they tired? I mean, isn't it draining to constantly whine and woe? Because I feel drained just listening to it. And then I leave our interaction a little less enthused, a little more melancholy, and their pessimism creeps into the rest of my day. Their black cloud somehow shifts and begins to hover over me as well. 

"I just had a great audition!"

"That's nice, I had one last week that went awful."

"Oh I'm sorry. I'm sure it was not as bad as you think. You'll get something!"

"Doubtful. And my mom's been giving me shit lately."

"I'm sorry. I'm having friends over for dinner this weekend, want to come?"

"I have to work. UGHHH I hate my job it's the worst I have the worst life my life sucks."

"....I'm sorry."

A lot of apologizing on my end. For what? What did I do? I mean, we all sympathize with each other but at a certain point it's like, COME ON, MAN. Leave the Debbie Downer routine for Rachel Dratch - you're not as funny.

You are the company you keep. So surround yourself with people who inspire you and are inspired by you. People who cheer for you from the sidelines. People who energize you and are there to recharge your batteries when you feel drained. People who face obstacles with grace and courage. Those who smile among frowns. Those who love amidst hate. Those who have compliments to give out rather than snarky remarks. 

Think about all those you interact with on a regular basis, are you getting what you need out of their friendship? Does your bond serve a purpose? What you put out into the universe is what you'll attract in return. Same goes for what you put into others! Make sure it all benefits you! And that isn't coming from a selfish mentality, rather a self-important one. "I value myself, and will surround myself with those who value me and whom I value in return."

It only takes one bad apple to ruin the bunch. 

You don't have to be that bad apple.

And you don't have to be that bad apple's friend. 

Friends who do this with you are keepers.