Work Begets Work

I would like to share an experience about a recent audition because it reminds me why I chose to pursue this for a living. 

I saw a casting notice about a month ago for a short film. The role was for a "Janeane Garafalo-type, super dry with no personality wardrobe designer." I submitted myself for the role because I thought it sounded like it would be a fun character to play. I ended up getting an audition, prepared the scene, and wrote the date and time in my planner.

CUT TO: DAY OF AUDITION

Here's a list of all other things written on my planner for that day -

-5:30 am : Take Alex to airport.
-Workout
-11 am commercial audition in Santa Monica
-Get groceries
-Return mall purchase
-Post office
-4:30 pm short film audition 
-6pm-12am work

Let me tell you, by 2pm I was exhausted. And the sound of a nap before work was way more appealing than having to get ready and drive over in traffic to this short film audition. I started thinking, "You've had a long day already." "There will be more auditions." "You should sleep before you have to work til midnight." "Who cares, this short film doesn't even pay."

And THAT, that is what is stopped me and prompted me to immediately get up and go to this audition. That thought. 

Is that why I do this? For the money? Absolutely not. If I made the same money acting that, let's say a teacher makes, I know I would still 100% do it. It's not about the money for me.

Auditions are hard enough to come by as it is, so every audition is nothing short of a blessing. Seriously. Did you know that for any particular role on TV, the casting office will get close to 3,000 submissions? And do you know how many people they call in for each role? 10-20. 20 is a stretch.

From 3000 to about 15. So you best be going to all your auditions AND appreciating the opportunity!!

CUT TO: AUDITION

So I made myself go to the audition, but of course they are running behind and I waited there for about an hour. I knew I absolutely had to leave by 5:30 to be at work by 6, and I told myself, "Well if you don't get seen by 5:35 you need to just leave." LUCKILY, one of my friends was there as well going in for a different role and she told casting I had to leave early if they'd please see me next. I got in the room at 5:33 and ran out the door 5:35 and made it to work on time.

CUT TO: THE NEXT DAY

I got a callback! So of course, I had go to that right? But the same thing happened, I had to be at work at 6 and they were running behind. So I went in, did my thing, and then quickly said thank you and proceeded to run out the door when the director stopped me and said, "What's your availability the week of August 12th?" At this point, it was like July 15th and I had no idea what my schedule would be like a month in advance, so I blurted out, "I don't know! Ask me August 11th!"and ran out the door.

CUT TO: THE WEEKEND

I got an email from the director saying they loved my interpretation of the character and they would like to offer me the role. COOL!

CUT TO: LAST/THIS WEEK

Making myself go to that audition was the best decision I could have made. Last week I got to go the table read at Sony Studios, a lot I had never been to before!! (A table read is when the entire cast sits, around a table and reads the script aloud) And yesterday, I was on set shooting! I went into hair and makeup, shot my scenes, and the footage looks amazing! The writer has plans to have it completed by November to submit to film festivals. Overall, I made some great network connections and am thankful for the experience.

And it's so true that work begets work, since booking the short film, I've been writing a lot more and am developing two series, one with friends, and one with Alex. And the day before I was set to shoot, I got the call that I had a producer's session for MODERN FAMILY, the DAY of the shoot. So yesterday my day consisted of waking up, driving to the Fox studio lot and auditioning for one of my absolute favorite shows, and then driving to set and shooting the short.

Getting to act all day - incredible! Did I get paid for anything I did yesterday? No, I did not. At least, not monetarily. But the experiences sure are priceless. So, say yes to the opportunities that come your way, you never know what they could blossom into. 

Here's a photo of the table read at Sony!

And here's a photo from yesterday's shoot! That's me on camera! 

To the LEFT, to the LEFT

No, this isn't a tribute post to Beyonce. That post will come in due time.

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL LEFT-HANDERS DAY!!!!

Besides using scissors and spiral notebooks, being left-handed is the bee's knees. My mom and grandma are both lefties. My best friend is a lefty. And both Alex's parents are lefties too! 

Today, I celebrate my handedness-heritage with sharing cool facts about lefties!

1. Between 10-12% of people on earth are “lefties.” Men are more likely to be left-handed than women.

2. Studies have suggested that left-handers are more talented in spatial awareness, math, and architecture.

3. Connections between the right and left sides of the brain are faster in left-handed people. This means information is transferred faster, making left-handers more efficient in dealing with multiple stimuli and using both sides of the brain more easily.

4. There are two divergent theories regarding wearing the wedding ring on the left hand. One theory is that it started with the ancient Egyptians, who believed that despite the left hand’s supposed flaws, placing the ring on this hand brought it nearer to the heart. Another theory attributes the origin to the Greeks and Romans, who wore the rings to ward off evil associated with the left hand.

5. Left-handers are more likely to pursue creative careers.

6. They are usually on polar ends of the intelligence spectrum, either likely to be geniuses (20% of MENSA is left-handed) or likely to have autism, stuttering problems, and dyslexia. 

7. They are more prone to allergies, migraines, insomnia, and alcoholism.

8. They're more affected by fear. In a recent experiement, lefties who watched an eight-minute clip from the film Silence of the Lambs exhibited more symptoms of PTSD than righties. That may be because the right side of the brain, which is dominant in lefties, is more involved in emotions like anger and fear. 

9. Lefties adjust more readily to seeing underwater.

10. Lefties excel particularly in tennis, baseball, swimming, and fencing. 

11. Left-handers usually reach puberty 4 to 5 months after right-handers. 

12. 4 of the 5 original designers of the Macintosh computer were left-handed. 1 in 4 Apollo astronauts were left-handed. And 4 of the last 7 Presidents are left-handed. 

13. About 40% of left-handers are homosexual. 

Famous Left-Handers: 

Tom Cruise	Leonardo da Vinci	Albert Einstein
Benjamin Franklin	Whoopi Goldberg	Cary Grant
Paul McCartney	Michelangelo	Jay Leno
Julia Roberts	Oprah Winfrey	Babe Ruth
Fidel Castro	Edwin “Buzz” Aldrin	Marilyn Monroe
Henry Ford	Helen Keller	Mark Twain
Bart Simpson	Dan Ackroyd	Tim Allen
Charlie Chaplin	Robert DeNiro	Jimi Hendrix
Jerry Seinfeld	Lewis Carroll	Paul Simon
H.G. Wells	Celine Dion	Larry Bird
Mozart	Beethoven	Aristotle
Barack Obama	Angelina Jolie	Brad Pitt
Alexander the Great	Julius Caesar	Marie Curie
Thomas Jefferson	Colin Powell	Gandhi
Charlemagne	Horatio Nelson	Ramses II
Billy the Kid (debated)	John Dillinger	Bob Dylan
David Letterman	Schumann	O.J. Simpson
Bill Gates	Fred Astaire	Judy Garland
Dick Van Dyke	Hans Christian Anderson	Sylvester Stallone
Sara Amini	Sara Amini	Sara Amini

Here's me in Orlando a few years ago at a Left-Handers store at Disneyworld.

If you know any or are a lefty yourself, I'm sending a virtual left-handed high-five today!!

Letting Go

I am reading a book right now talks about how your ego can actually get in your way and lead you further from the things you want.

The author gives a list of ideas you need to learn to let go of FIRST before you can set clear intentions for yourself and start moving towards making them a reality.

I'm going to share the 3 ideas that resonated the most with me:

1. Let go of your need to win: "Ego loves to divide us up into winners and losers. The pursuit of winning is one that will backfire. Because ultimately, winning is impossible all of the time. Someone out there will be faster, luckier, younger, stronger, and smarter - and back you'll go to feeling worthless and insignificant."

I'm still trying to wrap my head around the fact that losing is NOT the opposite of winning because I, by nature, am fiercely competitive. It's hard to swallow that just because I don't get something I want, doesn't mean someone else "won" and I "lost." That perceptive makes me frustrated and discouraged. I had a mentor say it best, "You're Coke. And sometimes people want Coke, and that's great. But sometimes people want Pepsi. It's as simple as that. Today, they aren't buying what you're selling. But that doesn't mean they won't buy it tomorrow."All we can be accountable is performing our personal best in the given circumstances, and if you feel you aren't at your best one day, hey, tomorrow is a new day, with new circumstances to consider.

2. Let go of your need to have more: "The ego is never satisfied. No matter how much you achieve or acquire, it will insist that it isn't enough. You'll find yourself in a perpetual state of striving, and eliminate the possibility of arriving. Yet, you've already arrived, and how you choose to use this present moment in your life is your choice. Ironically, when you stop needing more, more of what you desire seems to arrive in your life."

Appreciate all that shows up. Create. And then let it go. I 100% agree with the notion of needing it less brings more of it into your life. The whole needing is less is the hard thing to work on though! We all want want want! I don't know how many times I've focused on what I needed versus what I already have. "I'm 25 and I still haven't ___" "Time is ticking, I NEED to ____" "By the time I'm 30, I WANT to ___" Putting all these deadlines on achievements is so incredibly stressful and puts you in a constant state of anxiety. It needs to happen now! No, it needs to happen when it's supposed to happen.

3. Let go of identifying yourself on the basis of your achievements: "Be grateful for the abilities you've been given, the motivation to achieve, and the stuff you've accumulated. But do not allow yourself to be defined by your achievements."

Well, this is certainly the hardest one for me! "You are not defined by your achievements" is something that needs to be taped to my mirror and repeated multiple times each morning! I was a straight-A student all my life (I did get one B in college History but in my defense it was an 8am class so I just slept. A B is still pretty good for sleeping through class the entire semester). I put in the work, I got an immediate result. That's how I functioned for years. You study, you get an A. Action-Outcome. Action-Outcome. Every single time I wanted something tangible, I went out for it and got it. THEN, I PURSUED ACTING. You put in the work, you put in the work, you put in the work. You wait, you wait, you wait. Hmm. My brain is confused. Where's my immediate result?! "I practiced this audition all night, why didn't I book it?" -might as well be taped to my mirror because I find myself saying that a lot. That's not how this business works. That's not how life works! It will never happen when you want it to happen. And that has been my constant struggle since I moved here 3 years ago, living by the mentality that I'm planting seeds, and seeds take time and to grow. There's a reason why people say patience is a virtue. And if immediate results is what I need, I should become a professional college student. I've got about 8 more years of my youthful looks before classmates start to question my real age.

It's not black and white. It's not win or lose. Pass or fail. Have and have nots. 

I leave you today with my favorite quote: "Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not, but remember what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for."-Epicurus.

Have a great weekend.

Dinner for One

We've all sat at a coffee shop by ourselves. Grabbed a quick bite, maybe. Froyo, definitely.

But how many of us have gotten dressed up and made a dinner reservation, party of one?

How about buying just one ticket to a movie?

It wasn't until recently that I discovered the comfort of spending time with myself. It must be something that comes with age. When you're younger you just "wanna do hoodrat things with your friends." GO TO A RESTAURANT OR MOVIE ALONE?! AS IF! 

"Who's gonna share my popcorn with me? I can't finish a whole tub by myself and I can't take it home for later because reheated popcorn is gross. What if I have to pee? No one will be able to tell me what I missed when I get back. This isn't a very good idea." - actual neurotic thoughts I've thought when contemplating seeing a movie by myself for the first time.

I used to feel so sad for people who I'd see eating out alone. I'd think, "Don't they have friends? Why didn't they just get take out?" It never occurred to me that they could be eating alone by choice!

I think there's something really liberating about going out by yourself. It's sort of a declaration of, "Hey, I'm at ease with myself and I enjoy my own company, so why not?"

Yes, it's quiet - but in this day and age with our technology addictions and ADD brains, I can tell you from experience that it's refreshing to sit, comfortably, in the silence and just disconnect for a bit.

I took myself to PF Changs the other night. Nothing super fancy, I don't have fancy money. But I did have a 10 dollar off coupon! HEEEEEY! So I got dressed up (I mean dressed up for PF Changs standards) and called and made a reservation for one. I got there, and being a Sunday night, it was busy with parties of 4 and parties of 6 also waiting to be seated. I immediately panicked and hoped that I'd get a corner booth away from everyone else. But, of course, I got a center table in the middle of the dining room. And I took it.

And I did something I could never do when eating out with others, and that's observe the environment. I realized I'd never noticed the paintings on the walls, or the architecture of the ceiling. I watched other families and friends interact. There was a toddler who kept dropping his food and he'd look at me each time he did it, like he kept getting caught. There was a group of old friends who were arguing over who was going to pay. A group of young friends who ordered way too much food. A couple sitting next to each other in the booth (which I always think is adorable), enjoying their martinis and kissing every couple of minutes.

And then there was me. Just sitting, enjoying my iced tea and vegetable fried quinoa - no Facebook, no Instagram, no texts, no conversation, no hurry, nada. It was thoroughly delightful.

It's not something I could have done had I had company. I would have been half-talking, half-listening, Yelping what entree was best reviewed, then posting photos of my food on Instagram and checking every two seconds to see who approved of my dinner choice. #Yum #Food #Nomnom

I've also gotten into seeing movies alone, because, really, you don't need someone there next to you because you can't talk to them anyway. (Unless you're watching a horror movie, if you're watching it alone I probably will think you're a serial killer. Anyway, the last scary movie I saw was The Ring so luckily we won't meet, creepy movie theatre killer.)

My boyfriend and I have those times where our movie choices don't coincide. So when I want to see some obscure indie film, I go by myself. It's GREAT! It's become a little sanctuary for me. It's dark, you can't be on your phone and you can't talk to anyone. It forces you to just be in the present moment and that's what makes it worthwhile for me. Also, I've solved the popcorn sharing problem - I bring my own snacks in my purse. And if I miss a little of the movie because I have to pee, well, I think I'll be fine.

So, next time you're going to dinner and a movie, why not make it a solo date? 

I did whip out my phone to take this photo. I told myself, "Eat half and save the other half for tomorrow's lunch."

I mean, I did eat half. Two halves.

Friends and CO.

"Associate yourself with people of good quality, for it is better to be alone than in bad company."

I can't think of a quote that rings more true than this one by Booker T. Washington. 

Look around you. Do you thoroughly enjoy the company you keep? Are you positively stimulated by them? Do you respect them? Do they lift you up, support and encourage your endeavors? And are they around to catch you when you fall? 

The nature of the business I work in involves encounters with many a negative and jaded person. I get it, life is fucking hard, there are horrible days that can sometimes overshadow good days. You wake up late, there's too much traffic, you spilled coffee on yourself, an audition went badly, you get a parking ticket, you don't want to be at work, you have cramps. All of the aforementioned are things I've thrown a fit over. 

But I'm not talking about bitching about a bad day, I'm talking about carrying negative energy around you 24-7. Everyone has at least one person they can think of that is this glass-is-always-half-empty complainer, that friend or classmate or colleague whose life is just "THAT BAD." 

Well, I don't know them personally, but I'm going to make an assumption their life probably isn't THAT bad. In fact, at the very last do they have their health? Yes? Great, they can shut the fuck up. 

When having an awful day, I force myself to list things I am happy and grateful for. It certainly doesn't make the bad stuff un-happen, but it reminds me that there is always good in my life.

Negative people, jealous people, cynics, mean and disrespectful people -- they all feed off others. Others who listen to them, who give their complaints the time of day. People who tolerate them and deal with them because, "that's just how they are."

When I'm around someone who only has bad things to talk about, I wonder, aren't they tired? I mean, isn't it draining to constantly whine and woe? Because I feel drained just listening to it. And then I leave our interaction a little less enthused, a little more melancholy, and their pessimism creeps into the rest of my day. Their black cloud somehow shifts and begins to hover over me as well. 

"I just had a great audition!"

"That's nice, I had one last week that went awful."

"Oh I'm sorry. I'm sure it was not as bad as you think. You'll get something!"

"Doubtful. And my mom's been giving me shit lately."

"I'm sorry. I'm having friends over for dinner this weekend, want to come?"

"I have to work. UGHHH I hate my job it's the worst I have the worst life my life sucks."

"....I'm sorry."

A lot of apologizing on my end. For what? What did I do? I mean, we all sympathize with each other but at a certain point it's like, COME ON, MAN. Leave the Debbie Downer routine for Rachel Dratch - you're not as funny.

You are the company you keep. So surround yourself with people who inspire you and are inspired by you. People who cheer for you from the sidelines. People who energize you and are there to recharge your batteries when you feel drained. People who face obstacles with grace and courage. Those who smile among frowns. Those who love amidst hate. Those who have compliments to give out rather than snarky remarks. 

Think about all those you interact with on a regular basis, are you getting what you need out of their friendship? Does your bond serve a purpose? What you put out into the universe is what you'll attract in return. Same goes for what you put into others! Make sure it all benefits you! And that isn't coming from a selfish mentality, rather a self-important one. "I value myself, and will surround myself with those who value me and whom I value in return."

It only takes one bad apple to ruin the bunch. 

You don't have to be that bad apple.

And you don't have to be that bad apple's friend. 

Friends who do this with you are keepers.